godsell
– excellent cover page which communicates what is to come. context page is graphically crisp. the black
drop pins are difficult to see. yellow would have worked better. in future when you submit a project, have a
cover page, with contents page + a conclusion page. always!
this is not necessary when you orally present a digital copy. be careful with text direction. it is better to write in a sentence as you
have done on the cover page, the context page with the vertical text is
disturbing to read. the line, ‘base maps courtesy . . ‘ should be
horizontal, much smaller and should be a reference at the bottom of the
images. the introduction of colour on p7
is welcome and brings another dimension to the project, however on p8, be
careful of descriptive text that is capitalised on each line. the
capitalisation of ‘of, colour, and’ should not be. p13 chicken image is difficult to read the
text. the image and the text should be separated.
the chickens are marred by the text.
overall, a well presented project, infused with beautiful visceral
imagery. well done. 8.3/10
thantsha
– difficult cover page to access. what
is the title? what is pii
communicating? do not place images over
images. as intriguing p2 is, what is the
metaphor saying? this needs to be communicated explicitly. when you construct your pages, make the
running text aligned to the left and do not justify it unless you kern [look
this up] it – like a graphic designer would do. it the moment it appears clumsy
and it is squashed up against the image.
try and keep projects simple and structured. the font goes from lowercase to uppercase,
depending on the page. why? images are stretched
or squashed with some sourced and others not.
pages have text and others not.
overall the project is poorly expressed and it lacks proper
structure. the document exhibits that
the author was not in control and expresses sloppy work, even though there are
moments of poetic vigour. you need to
work much tighter and always use arial font.
in future, files should not labelled like this: arpl3003_2015_project_3_favourite place_seremi_thantsha, but like
this: arpl3003_2015_task_3_seremi_thantsha
5/10
zuma
-- too much unnecessary text on the
cover page. why? john moffat pond along with the authors name
at the bottom of the image, where the paving is, would have suffice and be much
crisper. source on p2? do not place images on images as done
throughout the document, this also makes the text inaccessible. what does this mean: the john moffat building was entertained in the mid 1950’s? why the
use of the word entertain? why not
mention the architect and the political era the building was, according to you, “entertained”? what is p9 + p13 articulating? images need to be sourced. clearly you and thantsha worked together and
thus influenced each other. it is a pity
that you both adopted bad habits like placing images on images and using the
terrible colour campus map., which in your case is distorted. you need to work much tighter and always use
arial font. project should always have a
contents and conclusion page. 5/10
maphumulo
– project beginning is the contents page.
why is there no cover page? a
contents page with headings should always be complemented with page numbers. the headings are poetic, especially the last
three – interaction, diversity + texture.
keep this residue always present in your future work. always do a spellcheck of your work to avoid
odd sentences like this: kitchner’s fits
appropriately in the braamfontein and johennesburg tas a city. the images narrating the project are
beautiful, textured and vibrant – well chosen.
but are they all yours? images should always be sourced, even if they
are yours. the permeabilty and accessibility
:internal page is marred by
the drawing. it is terrible! you can do much better and invest more time
in drawing graphics which have their own sense of aesthetic to compliment the
page as opposed to detract from it. this
is what your drawing does. the colour
coding circle thing is welcome. in
future this can be used to increase the visual expression of the page. p8 + 10
[especially 10] needs text to guide through the identity diversity bit like
you’ve done in texture of place. project needs a cover, conclusion + reference
page. overall, a visually striking and
poetic body of work, which uses colour, texture and vibrancy as a strong base
to propel a solid narrative. you need to
push yourself harder. 7.3/10
baloyi – a fantastic cover page marred by unnecessary text. would have like to
have seeing you using the title in a more creative manner for the cover. see accompanying image. preface page is welcome and project could
have done with a contents page. where is
this from: spaces become places as we get to know them better
and endow it with value, in the process of creating places people visualize,
memorize and thus stabilize constitutive human goods such as the sense of
belonging, social integration, purposes that give meaning to life (values) and
the sense of self. these meanings can be individual and based on personal
experience or they can be shared. the concept of place generally describes the
relationship between people and their local spatial settings, absorbing other
concepts such as place attachment, place identity and place dependence which a
very key in understanding the complexity of place or sense of place? it is a very profound paragraph which should
be used a genesis for the work to come.
refrain from placing photographs on photographs. after an amazing cover, with a thought
provoking preface, the project falls flat as it is compromised by unimaginative
imagery, poor layout and fuzziness.
always conclude and include a reference page. images must be referenced and files cannot be named like this: arpl3003_2015_task_3_baloyi_me
mfusi – very good cover page which communicates the vibrancy and colour of
braamfontein, but this could have been pushed further graphically. the text
info at the bottom of the page detracts from the beauty of the image. in future be mindful of this. contents page is welcome, back meaningless
without page numbers. the black orbs
would enhance the project if they have something to do with something, as
opposed to being just what they currently are. that being said, the project is
crisp and rich in colour and content. it
is well written and demonstrates a maturity that is welcome. keep working this way. the purple colour bar at the top of the page
could have been muted so it is less prominent.
serial vision page is a gem, but the text cannot be a single line spanning
the entire horizontal plane. this should
be a minimum of two columns. the
sentence line as it stand now, is too much to read. the street culture image is priceless, a
caption would have enhanced access. from
now onwards, do not use an underlying photograph as a template. project lacks a conclusion and a reference
page. overall it is beautiful and
displays robust engagement with the material + a fabric of the city, compelling
one to confront the fact that the truth is changing. 7.5/10
ncame – a dull and unimaginative cover page.
make sure you always use arial as a font. project lacks a contents page. that being said, the project displays a quiet
yet powerful poetic journey which is sensitively portrayed. the material is not only soft; it is, for a
lack of a better expression, just intimately beautiful. the author succeeds in taking the reader in
on a journey into the context of “jubes”
– internally + externally. in future
more care should be invested in layout and referencing. the pity is that the project terminates
suddenly, without a conclusion or a reference, somewhat jarring what is strong
work. 7.3/10
mutugi – an interesting
cover page which could have benefitted from the omission of the word task, the
number 3 and the green drapery thing farming the left and right of the
image. what is the use of this and why
is it repeated in every page? content
page is required. the intro is
captivating with the definition of space + place. but why do these not recur in
the project? wim facts should mention
the architects and what the space was before it was a museum. this is a lost opportunity. pages are too minimalistic, text would have
enhanced the pages and given the project another layer of richness. pity this didn’t happen. the actor remains curiously unmentioned yet
there are way to [present in the project to remain an enigma. who is it, why are they in the space, what do
the clothes they wear represent, why does the bag appear and reappear, why do
the shoes change colour, why are they not in some images, what is the
reflection about [it is a moving photograph]?
why . . ? the actor would have been an amazing element
if we experienced the museum through their eyes as they narrated the journey
for us, to then give us a conclusion. decent work which can be pushed much,
much more. 7/10
gwabeni – an interesting
cover page, somewhat scarred by the informing text at the bottom of the
page. next time, chose a single image
and frame your project around that.
there are some really beautiful images in this project. are they all the authors? captions are needed. project would have been enhanced by a
contents page and consistent layout.
stick either to 2 columns or 3, do not juggle between the two, it
displays a lack of control. the page titles are fantastic, especially the dialogue page. it’s a pity we cannot access noloyiso’s story
– take time to think about layout so that your project is clear and
concise. overall the work is competent,
well represented with images and narrated with the sensitive care that the area
represents. well done. just make sure you run your work through a
spell check and work on layout. project
needs a conclusion and proper referencing.
7/10
guya – excellent
cover page with an apt title, which is what the project is about – a piece of
the city in artistic motion. well
done. where is the contents page? the collage of a place within a space page is very striking. work on your layout, as in some of the pages
the text is pinched by the black. if you
insist on using black pages, then make the font colour white. the white strips where the text is written doesn't work so well. overall the work
is of strong quality. if the project
employed an appropriate layout, it would be of excellent nature. in future, make sure you run your work
through a spell check. kudos for the
conclusion and a reference page is required.
7.9/10
mandyanda – excellent
cover page which could have benefitted tremendously from a specific title and a
reduction of the unnecessary info – why is it important to include all that +
date? in future, if you have to have
this info, infuse it in the preface or contents page. anywhere except the
cover. this has to be poetic +
crisp. find a theme, state it and then
support it with imagery, as you have done on the cover. contents page is appreciated but can be
improved as in: locality map + route – 3, site – 5, space – 13, conclusion 15,
reference – 16. keep things simple and
crisp. the text on the reference page
cannot space the entire length of a landscape page – this should be at least 2
columns of text. the rest of the project
is well executed and displays heightened capacity. overall a very strong and
visceral project displaying a solid sense of maturity and beauty. in future work hard to achieve crisper
layout. 9/10
tsebe – a very good
cover page with an appropriate title.
nice one. fantastic contents
page. is the background image yours? in
future do a spell check to avoid words like this: conclusion and summaryy. an
informative body of work which requires better layout. work on this.
do not have images on images. all
images have to be referenced and the project has to have a conclusion plus a
reference page. the project abruptly
ends. work on a telling a compelling
narrative as opposed to responding uncreatively to a brief. take ownership of your work and push
yourself. overall the project displays
capacity, but could be executed in a crisper manner with a stronger
narrative. files cannot be named like
this: done. 5.7/10
nkoane – cool cover
page which is missing an appropriate title.
where is the contents page?
abstract page is informative, but what are pages 2, 4, 10 + 12 about? these need explanatory text. map on page 5
requires streetnames + other informants.
what do the white arrows signify and where exactly is this on the
planet? project is somewhat sloppy, using too many colours and bizarre
techniques. keep things simple. let the images and text do all the work. the blue text bounded by green borders on
black background on a white base is too busy and loud. work harder on your layout and a project
should always be concluded and referenced.
overall a good base, displaying capacity and latent talent. work harder
to make your work shine and gracefully expressive. 5.7/10
